Wednesday, February 09, 2011
I feel like my life is really up in the air in a lot of ways right now.
*WARING - LENGTHY RAMBLING AND MODERATE CUSSING AHEAD*)
The HusBean and I are both considering changing jobs (not necessarily job fields, but perhaps that eventually too).
It's not news to anyone that I can be brash and sometimes offend people with my tone. I'm working on that, have been since I was told in 2nd grade that I was "mean". This is and will be a life-long struggle for me. The interesting thing is that people that REALLY know me laugh hysterically when they hear that someone thinks I'm mean.
I WILL NOT, however, EVER be someone that tells you what you want to hear unless it is actually the truth. I am not a bull-shitter or ass-kisser. I just can't do it. Several relationships and important friendships in my past suffered because I let little lies here and there creep in and they grew and festered and poisoned everything. Immediately following the finale of the epic and dramatic 8-year relationship I decided NO MORE LYING, to ANYONE, for ANY REASON.
This doesn't mean that I'm going to march up to you and tell you that you look fat in those jeans. I'm not out to hurt anyone's feelings, and any time that I have done so I am truly sorry. Unfortunately my sarcastic sense of humor (Hi, Dad!) sometimes gets away from me and people take things the wrong way... and then I'm in trouble.
I have truly enjoyed being in a management position the last 5 years, I am great at getting things done. Everything in my life is tackled from a project-management point of view and I like to accomplish things as fast as possible while still doing them right (after all, if you don't do it right to begin with, you're just wasting more time).
I am not interested in babysitting at work. If there is a task to be completed, I will explain the objective AND the most efficient way to get there. If you want to do things your own way and they turn out to be more efficient than my way, that's great! We'll likely do things your way from now on (in that particular task). HOWEVER, if you do things your own way and it is a waste of time, don't be surprised when I ask again that it be done the efficient way.
Ultimately there are two types of people that work with me. 1. Those that are willing to work hard and fast and do things right. 2. Those that don't particularly want to work hard, and therefore not interested in fast or right, either.
I get along GREAT with the first type. We get a lot done together (I don't just order people around and then sit back and watch, I am generally up to my eyeballs in whatever it is, too) and we respect each other. When you do an awesome job, I will tell you how much I appreciate your work, and I will brag on you to everyone else, too!
The second type invariably gets angry with me, gets their feelings hurt, and does whatever they can to avoid working with me in the future.
All of this in mind, I am considering starting a project/event management business.
I have some interesting (to me) health issues that have recently come to light that are likely affecting our ability to procreate.
I haven't decided how much of this to share publicly at this point, as we are still figuring out the plan of attack. What I WILL say is that I am interested more in removing obstacles than throwing prescription drugs at them.
I'm finding that the older I get the more I realize what is truly important to me.
I have always been "artsy". My parents are both musicians and it has been passed along to me in full force. I was in choirs as early as I was allowed, and following high school (where our choir took 3rd and 4th in state competitions) I have been in a Christian-Rock band (Three Days Waking), a swing trio (The Swing Sisters) and an acoustic trio (Ella Mental) in addition to a little bit of writing here and there.
My Barbies lived in what my parents referred to as a "Pueblo Community" - printer paper boxes turned on their sides and stacked, each box becoming a room in a giant Barbie-apartment. (Apparently an early flair for home decor?) Many of my mother's socks were sacrificed and re-purposed into mahvelous tube dresses (this was the 80's), and most of the dolls ended up with punk hairdos because I couldn't resist cutting their hair and the coloring the remains with felt markers.
The Pueblo Community was stacked underneath two wooden doors that were bolted into the wall and turned into a miniature train setup.
My walls and ceilings were covered with drawings (usually abstract).
I got in to scrapbooking about 10 years ago, have done some abstract paintings from time to time, and started making floral arrangements and wreaths.
I have REALLY enjoyed doing home decor (my job helped inspire what was already a budding interest) and specifically table settings of late.
While living in Key West I started developing an interest in cooking. Thanks to our friend Jenny who is a chef, I learned that making the "fancy stuff" can be easy, and The HusBean and I both developed appreciation for many new tastes. Since moving to Georgia, The HusBean has really gotten in to cooking (in addition to the hot sauce business) and when I have time I enjoy creating recipes for things and making the recipes that have pleased friends and family in the past. (We post most of these over on our food blog.)
I apologize for the rambling-ness of this post (but hey, I WARNed you up top), but I guess it all boils down to realizing what you enjoy doing and what is important to you.
What is important to ME? God, Family, Friends, Honesty, Hard Work, Music, Food and Creativity.
Oh yeah, and animals.