I've puked at LEAST 6 times in the last half hour. I've been pacing in the back yard, praying, and calling to leave my boss a voicemail to let her know I may have to come in late.
I think that's the thing that gets to me most about the panic attacks, is that I get myself worked up worrying that I'm going to let someone down.
Ultimately I have to accept that life can go on with or without me, whether I'm in charge of it or not.
I think my problem tonight is that I haven't slept well again this week, got a sunburn on Thursday, and haven't been drinking enough water to make up for either of those things. Then I ate junk for supper followed by a half of a giant chocolate chip cookie that has since been regurgitated.
I am not really stressed about the wedding. I know that I will survive this and be fine, and if necessary will get a doctor to prescribe me drugs so I can get through the thing doped to high heaven.
Right now I need to relax and breathe. And pray a lot more.